Happy Birthday James!

Today is my little brother’s 21st birthday.  I am dedicating this entry to him.  He is one of my heroes.  He inspires me daily.  I hope one day to be as calm, cool, level-headed, spiritually in-tune, alive, funny, energetic, caring, and loving as he.

He has become such a good friend of mine since arriving at adulthood.  He has always been so awe-ispiring.  It’s just so much fun to watch  him and his life and his wise-beyond-his-years-not-from-this-world decisions.  He was definitely put here for great things.

As a kid he was so clumsy and accident-prone.  He was the one of us 3 kids that got stitches every summer or something like that.  Of course, my older brother and I probably added to some of that because we picked on him non-stop.  He’s the youngest.  It comes with the territory.  We would tie him up and make him do stupid shit.  And he did it all gladly!  He just wanted to be with us.  He was more so like this with my older brother because I was such a loner as a child even within my own family.  I was his #2 pick behind our older brother when it came to play time.  And for me, both of them fell behind myself and my imagination.

Then I left for college when he was still a kid.  Well, he was 14, but a kid to me.  I only came back twice a year since then and suddenly in like one year my little brother became my BIG little brother and would pick me up to hug me whenever I came back to visit.

He became a man so suddenly to me.  It almost seemed overnight.  I didn’t know my little brother as a teenager.  I have stories he told me on the phone and pictures from my parents and accolades for his athletic achievements from newspapers.  But I didn’t experience any of these things.  I even missed his high school graduation because I couldn’t afford to come home at the time.

My dad is a track and cross-country coach.  We are a running family.  And my little brother was and is the most athletic of us all.  I never once saw him run a cross country meet with his highly ranked team.  I did, however, get to see him run once at the state track meet.  That was when I skipped my college graduation to come and visit my family instead…a decision I have NEVER regretted.  On that trip home, he was a junior in high school and we both had friends attending ISU so we went for a weekend road trip up there to visit our respective friends.  It was nice to ride in the car with my wise almost-grown little brother.

He used to call me for advice.  I was the person he called when he secretly got a tattoo on a trip with a friend in Hawaii.  Now, I call him for advice.  He is so insightful.  He is one of those “rocks” in my life.  He keeps me stable and sane and I can feel his love across the miles.  He doesn’t think I’m some hippie California freak.  He knows I’m flawed.  He sees my flaws and loves me anyway.  He is my friend.  A great friend.

I wish him all the happiness and success in the world.  He deserves it more than anyone I know.  He holds it in his hand, too.  I know it.  I can feel it.

When we were kids, he was the one who got picked on all the time.  We would make fun of him–especially for some of the stupid things he’d say.  He always had stupid jokes that Mom liked but were not funny.  Now he cracks me up more than anyone else.  He would also say a lot of bizarre stuff.  Stuff like remembering before he was born all this stuff that had happened.  We thought he was just talking nonsense.  He would say things to my mom that he said God had told him.  Not in a creepy way either.  He has ALWAYS had this calm peace about him.  Just being around him for 2 minutes will make you feel it.

He is destined for great things.  And he knows it.  ANd he claims it…without arrogance.  I admire that so much.  I feel so blessed to be his sister and  to have him in my life.  My entire family spoils me rotten with just their presence and their deep and loving souls.  I do not know sometimes how I got so lucky.  I feel like sometimes that I’m a HUGE misfit.  I’ve always felt that way.  But my little brother reminds me that even though I may feel that way, that he would not have anyone else as his sister.  And I feel the EXACT same way about him.

I do not know what it is like to be a parent and to love a child of your own.  I know what it is like to love my family, though.  ANd oh boy, the love I have for them overtakes me so much sometimes that I need to sit down to take it all in.  I am sending massive amounts of this love to a small town in Iowa today…and everyday…(:


About heathencomehome

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2 Responses to Happy Birthday James!

  1. Teresa K. Smith says:

    It is such an honor and gift to be your mother and the mother of your brothers.
    Love, MOM

  2. Pingback: …Bright Eyes | Heathen Come Home

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