Thoughts…not to be confused with poetry…

My ignorance

She took his hand

He took her heart

And held it

My ignorance

She laughed

Home

She felt

They danced in circles

She cries

Dancing in circles let your hair fall down and your head fall back

Bleeding and crying and sitting and waiting and living and Holding hands and Smiling and cursing and laughing in that sinister way

Why won’t it come back to me?

I had it I felt it I saw it I read it

Every single thing I can remember

Doesn’t make any sense

I try

I tried

I try

Fail.fail.fail.

Be beautiful

Where did it all go?

Make believe Create and destroy And imagine–which is one of my favorite words

Make love to me with passion so that I will no longer think.

Take away my thoughts and make me bleed

Please

Ravagee me and beat me down and give to me nothing and everything leaving me empty and full and satisfied and wanting and moving and immobile and wise and dumb and insane and logical and seduced and betrayed and loved and beaten and held and alone

Tame and release me

Hug and kiss and slap and kick

Wiggle and wiggle and wiggle

Be 5-years-old

…or 35

talk to me talk to me talk to me

listen

stare at me and violate me and make me feel

uncomfortable

no no no stop

My ignorance

no excuses for me

stop talking

look and feel and caress and strangle and choke

drink me up take me in go away

judge me harshly

be cruel

let me see

keep coming

kick and scream and yell and break my heart

think about it

close your eyes and see it all black with stripes and polka dots

*laugh

Stay awake and never sleep

Close your eyes and feel depair and see my ignorance

Judge me hate me blame me

I’ll never talk I’ll never say a word I’ll be silent and mute and you’ll look into my eyes if you want and I’ll look into your eyes if I can

Stealing lines/Saving lives

Steal it take it bury it praise it

Remember this one for yourself but not for me

Forget me tomorrow

Draw my blood on my right outer thigh please and time its travels down my leg until it stops for awhile somewhere where it belongs and wonder why about everything until it makes mind travel in reverse and unlearn

I must go

Is that all

Never ever not a chance

oh no…

exhale.breathe.surrender.again to a new day and cry a little but not too much.  sweat it out and cover it up and smell of your own despair.

He watched and read her a story in the midnight dark blue with a mist from a storybook as the trains went by.  And he saw a sparkle and a twinkle and a moonbeam in her hair and it wisped away and then came back unnoticed.  He cried.  But she did not.  Kind of like dreams.  Mostly like dreams.  All like dreams.

What I see

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About heathencomehome

question marks & ellipses
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