$ My ego $

How/why has money and income become more sensitive of a topic than sex, health, death?  What does this say or the current human evolution?  Money is energy.  Are we reluctant to discuss energy?  Sex is an exchange of energy too.  Yes, but many (including me) are quite closed off to that exchange.  Thus, it is still a selfish act for many.  We enjoy talking about ourselves, getting attention–our egos enjoy this.

We can all have sex.  It is common to us all–just like we all live and die and have struggles.  Money and income we have delegated to another category.  We all do NOT have money.  We have different incomes & spend our money differently.  But, who are we kidding, sexual experiences are vastly different as well!  We don’t all experience it the same, that’s for sure!

It hasn’t always been this way.  Centuries…heck, probably as recently as decades ago.  People were more likely to talk about income/money than sex.  But people also seemed to have a “place” in the money world/game.  Everyone knew everyone’s financial status.  It was just out there.  Not hiding back in the day if you were a peasant or some shit.  No hiding if you were an aristocrat.  You either accepted it or flaunted it.  If you had little, you relied on others in your boat and you all kinda worked together knowing that was your life.  Not expecting or acting like you had more or less than you did.  Same with if you were a richie-rich type.  You flaunted it and hung out with others who did the same and you all were rich together and knew it and bragged, I’m sure.  (Of course I am VERY loosely postulating ALL of this, but I think it is relevant…I think…)  But, then again you didn’t talk about sex then.  You did it.  It was fun.  Heck, read Shakespeare!  But it was all hinted at, never openly discussed.

Our society has become more loose when it comes to discussing openly and displaying sexual matters.  (Well, some of us are still Puritanically resisting it, but it is much more widely discussed nonetheless.)  Also, in doing so and becoming a more “open” society (in MANY ways) we live in a time when we can be and do anything.  Have as much as we want.  Work hard for it.  Make your own living whatever you make of it.  This seems a bit more isolated of a stance when it comes to money and finances.  Yes, we say anyone can move up or down or all that shit, but it is on your own.  Make your OWN living.

I’m not advocating communism or a change in the financial structure.  I’m simply discussing (with myself) the need for a shift in the way money is thought about and talked about.

WHat is it in money that we fear?  It does have power over people, yes.  But this is power WE have given it!  It is simply energy!  I, for one, fear it.  I know I do because I block its flow.  I have so little of it.  I expend all sores of it I have–I blow my load!

I used to be completely opposite (and not that long ago…) with money-energy.  I’d just store up and save up that energy and never use it on ANYTHING!  What changed?  What shifted?  I still must be oneof the masses afraid to discuss it.  It is the most sensitive subject in my life right now.

I think we avoid this topic because unlike any other form of energy, money ties us to and makes us reliant upon one another.  If we avoid talking about money, we avoid the fact that it is a shared energy that is dormant without another individual.  So we de-humanize it by not talking about it…because what it really is is our ability to either help or be helped and our energetic capacity or need for one another.

Talking abotu money makes us vulnerable in a new andn different way.  It lays bare the soul’s capacity to give and receive.  I, for one, can feel as I write this how uncomfortable I am with people knowing that.  What would they think?  How will I be judged…perhaps differently…

It really is a window into one’s soul  and the energetics of its workings.  Why am I so protective of this (ooops, “why” question/google earth statement…)  This is definitely NOT serving me!

Hmmm, if others knew, I’d have to  be honest–always and ALL WAYS.  I couldn’t refuse help from anyone anymore.  Others could see me.

Basically what it comes down to is my ego would not be able to keep me living a facade.  Whether it be a small facade or a large one.  The ego likes “making” me into its version of me.  The me it thinks I should be.  The me it thinks is safest…for it.  The facade involves a certain monetary/income status that I need to project…which wavers depending on whose company I’m in.  But the truth doesn’t.

Perhaps one’s money situation and his or her ability to dialogue about it is a window into the soul for no other reason than in simply destroying the ego’s hold on another area of one’s life.  If for no other reason than this, then I feel opening up my ability to dialogue, converse, and share about money is something I choose to explore, experiment, investigate, and challenge myself to consciously do more and more.



About heathencomehome

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