…Bright Eyes

I love how I have the ability to turn my own day around and to turn my own outlook around.
And I did just that.
Well, not COMPLETELY on my own. Yoga helped…especially the extra deep meditation at the end thanks to my rockin’ teacher. My friend’s little smile via another blog link that cheered me up. An email reply from my mom and my yogi friend. An email from Grandma S. A phone conversation with my wise little brother. A CrossFit workout that provided tangible proof I’m getting stronger!

But all of those things I initiated! And for that I am so grateful to myself. Ya know, after CrossFit today, I was thinking about re-applying for a job at lululemon in BH because one of my instructors works there and the staff is almost completely changed and, well, I need the money. So, as much as I found it frustrating, I’m spending tomorrow looking into that. But as I was thinking about it, I realized that the goals they had me set when I worked there over the winter holiday season (they are BIG on goal-setting) are almost all met! What an AWESOME thing! I had to step back to see that. It felt so awesome and was that last step to turning my day around. I even called the BH store and was gonna inquire into whether they were hiring, but instead I just thanked them for pushing me to set goals and wanted to let them know how far I’d come on mine. It felt so awesome just to share that with them. And I think the manager who answered the phone appreciated it too.

I told my lil bro today on the phone that it started out as one of those days I just want to sleep through and never leave my room. But, as I said, I am not feeling depressed enough for that to truly be an option. I am actually feeling quite vital! And I think that is why I’m so frustrated. Ya know, on Abraham’s scale of emotions, anger is higher than insecurity and depression and powerlessness and despair. And worry and disappointment are even higher than anger. And right now I’m feeling frustration, which is actually higher than all of those and is in the top half of the list! So, when I take a step back today, for the first time I can do a positive “google-earth” assessment!

WOW! This is huge! Like, I am so happy and proud of myself for just doing that! Ok, taking a moment for me right now. A moment to observe and celebrate what is just right now HAPPENING!

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About heathencomehome

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