Yesterday, one of the sous chefs at work asked me if i was married. Not in a hitting on me way, but in like an I-honestly-thought-you-were-married way. I was totally shocked and taken aback by this because I’m about as far from married as one can be. So, I wondered what it was about me that gave off this “married” vibe.
In response, I asked him if he was married and it started a little mini-conversation about marriage. This dialogue only lasted about 2 minutes, but it really stirred something in my head. In those brief 2 minutes, some long-held beliefs and opinions began to morph. It started with his question of how long I thought an engagement should last. I have always thought long engagements are ridiculous. But, then again, I think conventional licensed-by-the-state marriage is ridiculous too. I found the words “However long you want” coming out of my mouth without thought or censorship from myself. THat sent me up into my brain immediately to begin to process what I’d just let out. I instantly felt a belief shift happening. I followed my comment with, “Why the fuck should I care how long you’re engaged.”
That pulled a string that is now unwinding a whole bunch of attached parts…my beliefs are changing…and I don’t no where it will lead me.